You know when you get a song stuck in your head and – even though it’s by Justin Bieber – you just cannot seem to shake it? It’s a horrible song, and you know you don’t like it, and yet there it is – for days. Well (and stick with me on the metaphor here), that’s what happened with my starter at Hemelse Modder last weekend…
It was all highly disturbing. I ordered the rilletes. I order rillettes pretty much every time I see them on a menu. So it’s fair to say, I both know that I like rillettes, and know when they’re good. These were not. Rillettes should be like pulled pork, but then melting with goose fat. (Or something like that – they don’t have to be pork, and the fat doesn’t have to be goose – but you catch my drift.) These were gristly, flabby, under-seasoned, and (for some reason best known to the chef) cut with parsley and something that was probably mushroom-based, given my gag reflex. I finished only one out of the three quenelles on my plate, but they got stuck in my head like a Robin Thicke video all the same. I still wanted to gag 24 hours later.
Fortunately for all concerned (I don’t think my tables mates could bear to hear any more about my Rillettes Trauma by this point) the main course was a big improvement. It was also vegetarian, which is rare for me in a restaurant situation, but then again it involved artichokes (always a draw). The artichoke hearts were stuffed with lentils and goat’s cheese, and came with a few random florets of broccoli. It was all quite tasty but presented in a way that said “Tuesday night supper at home”, not “Saturday night out in a restaurant”.