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Lab 111: is it a morgue? Is it a laboratory? No, it’s a restaurant!

On Friday night, I was ‘taken’ out for dinner. The ‘taken’ is in inverted commas because, invariably in these situations, what happens is that I choose a restaurant, I choose the menu, I choose the wine, and someone else pays. Ideal, right? (Well, yes, although I know I’ll have met my match in a man when he can choose the restaurant and there’s still a future…)

Anyway, I was with a friend for dinner (a belated birthday present) at Lab 111 and I wasn’t complaining. The walls are all Mondrian geometry and primary colours – an almost childlike decoration of what apparently used to be a morgue and anatomy lab – while the DJs are shaven headed and the waiters too cool for school.

We ordered oysters to start, which were fresh – and that’s really all that’s worth saying about oysters. We drank South African Sauvignon Blanc which, when the waiter came to pour it for me to taste (as he damn well should – there’s nothing worse than ordering wine only for the sommelier to pour it for your male date to taste), my friend admitted: ‘You do seem to be rather taking control here, don’t you?’ Ok, it’s an affliction…

Next up I had the confit duck with some sort of summer version of stamppot which involved sweet potato and curly cabbage. While there was nothing wrong with the constituent parts, the whole left me feeling distinctly underwhelmed: lacklustre mash with generic jus and out-of-a-can duck leg. So far, so average.

Dessert was a crème brulee (they had none of the rhubarb tart left, which I was disappointed about – although they did bring me a little dish of stewed rhubarb when they saw the look on my face), which was similarly average.

For possibly the first time in my career as the Amsterdam Foodie, I’d score the service higher than the food: if the waiters were slow, it was because they didn’t want to interrupt our conversation, and when I asked them for the name of a track that the DJ was playing, they brought it over to me on a piece of paper.

I don’t know how much dinner cost because, as I said, I was ‘taken out’. But Lab 111 is a venue that’s too conscious of itself as a space, and not as a restaurant, which means its kitchen takes backstage to its artsy showmanship.

all the info

Lab 111 (International)
€€

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